What If I Don't Want A "Funeral" Service?


For most families, a funeral service when someone dies is a logical way to give everyone a chance to memorialize and honor the deceased. Yet these services aren't everyone's cup of tea; it's possible that you don't like the idea of everyone gathering around and talking about you in that setting. Luckily, you have a few options for your final wishes, and a funeral home can still help your family deal with your death even if you don't want to hold a traditional style of service.

Additional Options Are Available

Funeral services aren't always the only service that people have after they die. A typical funeral service of the type where people get up and speak about the deceased in a chapel-type setting while the coffin is in the room differs from a graveside service, for example. Many funeral homes are associated with cemeteries, and in fact, many funeral homes are actually located at the cemetery where the associated burials are held. You can arrange to skip the in-chapel service and have a brief graveside ceremony or ask the funeral home to serve as a place where the family can meet briefly if you're being cremated.

Pre-arrange and Pre-pay Your Final Wishes and Let Your Family Know

Once you know exactly what you want and have discussed it with the funeral home, pre-arrange and pre-pay for your final wishes. For example, if you want to be cremated and have the ashes stored in a columbarium that is run by the funeral home, make those arrangements now and pay for as much as you can. Even if your family disagrees with your choices, it will be harder for them to walk away from a pre-paid plan.

It's also vital that you let your family know what you've arranged and that you add it to your final will or trust instructions. You can't control much of what they do after you die when you aren't around to discuss it with them, but if you leave formal, pre-paid plans, there's a good chance they'll simply follow those.

See If the Funeral Home Has Services to Help Your Family Navigate Paperwork

Funeral homes are supposed to arrange funeral services, but as part of that, they often are able to give advice on the next steps for dealing with all the paperwork that goes with handling someone's estate. They aren't lawyers, but if your family has never handled things like a will or probate before, many funeral homes do prepare general "game plans," for lack of a better term, to guide people through the process. TV and movies often depict a lawyer or accountant taking over the process from the family, but that's not what happens for most people. Even if you don't want a traditional funeral service or memorial service, you should see if the funeral home provides this smaller service to ensure your family has some idea of what to do next.

Talk to your local funeral home and see what they can help you arrange. You don't have to have a traditional service like your parents and grandparents might have had; nowadays, funeral homes offer more options.


26 February 2020

Saying Goodbye With Grace

Unfortunately, death is an inevitable part of life. Everyone knows this, but the knowledge does not make it easier to handle the passing of a loved one. A good funeral home understands what you are going through and takes steps to make this challenging time easier on you and your family members. From leading a memorial service to hosting a viewing, funeral homes can help you say goodbye with grace. If you would like to learn more about funeral homes and the services they offer, check out the articles on this website. We think you will find them informative and helpful in the most caring of ways.